“It is time that we all see gender as a spectrum instead of two sets of opposing ideals.”
And today I will be focusing mainly and the most important things that men face just them because if I don’t dedicate a complete whole post to it and not just pieces in all posts my male best friend will kill me.
Women acting weak, pretty normal, men not so, our society is so messed up that men aren’t allowed to act ‘weak’ as it’s said or to actually express their emotions (which totally isn’t weak and I wrote about it in the second post in this series so yeah). It doesn’t actually let men take a step back at times and always emotionally pressurizes them to be so closed off and not pay much attention to their mental health.
Now misuse of power by females, it happens a lot, a few days back I looked up on this dowry case that had happened in my city and the family which the female had accused was innocent but had to face unnecessary 12 years in jail because of that, another incident is what happened last year in Lucknow when a woman thrashed a cab driver for absolutely no reason and accused him of hitting her (you can read more on this here). So my main point here is that with the changes coming up in our society and the laws being made these days men have it horrible with the judicial system as statistically with the up and coming human right laws females are believed 34% more in the judicial system because of the inequality, so the judicial system of the entire world is pretty messed up (more on this in the next point).
So a few days back I was watching this Infographics Show video on death row (don’t ask why, do watch the video it has all the statistics to prove my point) anyways so after watching it I looked up more on that and yeah here we are (heads up all of these numbers are of America I could not find of the world or India).
So let me put out a few facts here 12% of all murders are committed by females in the US, but of these 12% convicted with death only 2% are actually put on death row unlike men who are more likely to be committed. Since studies show that women have more redeeming qualities they are put on death row less than males and the average jury feels this way too, so when murders are committed by a male and a female the male is way more likely to get a harsher sentence than the female which by the way is not fair to males. Many defense lawyers have also said that it’s much easier to get a woman off a death row than a man. This problem exists in more judicial cases too and punishments not just death rows. Here is the link to the video for more information.
Also my friend SNF told me about a few science facts about both genders and I’m just gonna put these here before he rants on about how unequal I get (even though I totally don’t) 😐
Females can see 100 more times the color that an average male sees.
Females have naturally more endorphins than males so they are able to bear around 30 times the pain a man can bear.
Also I found this really creative post with these wonderful illustrations on double standards, do check it out here. And we’re done for the day, in case I missed a few (which I know I did) so please help me out and I will highlight them in the next post!
“My feminist dream is to one day not be surprised when an item of clothing I’ve bought has pockets”
We all knew I was gonna finally get to pockets (yeah okay it’s an inside joke I know those of you who are on my instagram got this one) So today let’s talk about the double standards with clothing and overall outlook. LETS GOOOOOOOO PS I know I’ll skip many and these are just the more commonly faced ones so yeah you can add more in the comments also I’m sleepy and lazy and it’s 1am right now, we will be ignoring any grammar mistakes grammatical errors which I might make, thank you.
Let’s start with hair first……. First of all when a man has long hair he is insulted and said it doesn’t suit him or just majorly criticized and labelled wild but women are encouraged to have long hair and many a times with short hair they are criticized or scowled upon (it happens a lot statistically 67% of the females with short hair have heard all these remarks, now I for one haven’t to that extant but people do generally label me as a tomboy or way too boyish because of my short hair, but hey I don’t care what you think, I am a girl and short hair is easier to manage, end of discussion). If a person wants to have long hair, let them, same with short hair, WHY THE DIFFERENCE WITH GENDERS LIKE IT’S HAIR PEOPLE. Like traditionally it’s said in old texts that men had short hair cause they had to fight so yeah, I don’t think most men are going and killing other men and fighting with them just cause they stole their potato chips now are they? Then let’s get to body hair, COME ON PEOPLE, I get it, if a person wants to shave because of hygiene or just for themselves it’s okay, but why are women who have body hair looked down upon and forced to shave them WHEN IT’S TOTALLY FINE THAT MEN HAVE BODY HAIR AND NO BODY MINDS (I’ve faced this, I fight with my mom about this every single day, our society sucks people).
Moving on, clothes. Alright, let’s face it, even men have it bad here. I’ll start with a personal incident, few days back a few of my friends had this image of a model wearing lehenga and were criticizing him on the group and then just started insulting that man so bad cause he was wearing clothes traditionally designed for females. So my main point, women can wear suits and men’s clothing (I literally am wearing a pair of pajamas from the boy’s section, not that it matters but meh, also it has pockets, we’ll get to that later) and men are shamed when they wear women’s clothing. NOW WE GET TO SHORTS Alright so I have no clue about the things in foreign countries but here in India after a girl reaches teenage and all they generally don’t wear shorts cause society and the aunties who gossip, it’s not bad in cities but in rural areas, woah. It’s there in many other cultures too, but we’ll not talk about it right now and will just leave this here.
The way of sitting and posture-(I feel like I’m writing a social science 5 marker answer which is why I’m adding personal commentary side by side today so it doesn’t feel like that, anyways yeah) so (I’m telling this about India by the way) when sitting with legs wide open that’s sitting like a man apparently so yeah and basically just that it’s annoying and women are supposed to sit shyly and sophisticatedly like WHY (ok this is not much of a point than a rant so feel free to ignore this one)………..?????????
Given that I have now covered the main points that I wanted to, in case I’m forgetting something I’ll add that in the morning so yeah my favorite and the topic I’ve wanted to talk about since ages POCKETS Oh and a few of my friends even challenged me on this so I got them proofs and did A TON OF RESEARCH LIKE A LOT which I’ll link in the end cause why not.
First a short version of this
Throughout the history, ever since pockets were first made, when men went to war they have never been stitched into female garments, these days they are there but never much for, as the old historical texts quote, ‘there was no need for women to leave and go out hence killing the use of a pocket’ this indicates how in the past few centuries women were locked up and their freedom taken away from them.
Now a longer one cause yeah it’s gonna be long so we will tell it in the form of a story (that or I’ll just fall asleep both work)
So imagine your name to be Cerena (side note I had this guitar; my first guitar, I named it Cerena cause like I treated it like a human and I was like 10 and yeah very childish but every night I used to tuck it in with a blanket and all) living in the early 18th century few 400 years back, your grandmother tells you stories of how in their times her grandmother told them everyone used to have bags in which they carried stuff instead of sewing them in their clothes like these warriors did in these new times. Also more to the setting now a decade back a war broke out and men are trained to leave for battles and they have these things called pockets stitched into their clothes for hiding things when they leave for war and to reduce their luggage, meanwhile whenever you go out, which is very rare because the society, you always have to carry an extra bag which causes you great inconvenience but again you cannot do anything about it because society. Oh also you were supposed to wear that bag under your clothes, which was totally inaccessible deeming it completely useless. Fast forward a few decades, french revolution begins and women see how they can create a change, so do a few of your grandkids who are inspired by this. And then we fast forward a hundred years when your grandkids have had grandkids (and OMG why does this feel like a video on the infographics show (which is very awesome btw, I love that channel, it’s super interesting, I can give you the link if you want) anyways back to our topic now) who have had children and now start fighting along with a women’s association for a change in this in circa 1871 AD. And though there is little impact you know there is a change. Around 80 years later, some impact comes and oh look fake pockets and here is the legendary Christian Dior’s (about whom we study in our french book for culture and civilization for getting 10 whole marks) take on it. He cemented the sexism of pockets in 1954 by stating, “Men have pockets to keep things in, women for decoration.” And then we fast forward 70 years and we are still having the same argument. Many old texts say that women had no need to go out and giving them independence was dangerous and since they didn’t go out, there was no need for said pockets, such sexist pigs they were. Anyways statistics show that around 70% of the fashion industry is dominated by men who believe in Dior and hence whenever we go to buy a nice cozy pair of pajamas in which we can keep our hands in the pockets to protect ourselves from that cold air in the morning, we can’t, because they rarely exist, how delightful. Which is why I straight head to the men’s section, POCKETS PEOPLE, I need them to hide chewing gums…
Anyways in case you wish to read a non (wannabe) hilarious version and a more serious one you can go here, here and here.
And an hour and over a thousand words later I have finally finished this post now I need to do formatting and proof reading, how wonderful…… Anyways I hope you like it and point out as many points you face and want to be added here, for now I bid you adieu mes amis.
“She overcame everything that was meant to destroy her and that in itself was enough to bring a change……..”
And thus we begin again (pun intended if you got it, ik one of you will), today I’ll rant on about Double Standards in our society, since there are soo many of them that I found out, I’ll make a few parts of this cause I have over 15 of these so maybe 3 in each post? Cause otherwise it’ll be too long and I kinda need content too so uh yeah😅 (We all will ignore the fact that I am VERY lazy) Letttsssssgoooooooooooooo
“When a woman cries, it’s viewed as normal. When a man cries, he’s told to man up” Throughout the world, crying is a symbol of the weak, when in reality it makes you stronger once you accept that you have feelings and suffer trauma. It’s generally said that whenever a person starts crying that person is acting like a girl because the society associates feelings and emotions to women and shows men as feelingless which is said that that shows them as stronger. Men are told not to cry because they are depicted as the stronger gender and crying is for the weak. In reality though, this world would be a better place if we let both genders express their emotions because that is a symbol of strength and accepting life at it’s best.
“A man does something it’s strategic, a woman does the same thing, it’s calculated; a man is allowed to react where a woman can only over-react”-Taylor Swift The society has a different vocabulary for the same things both the genders do, but a match harsher one for women. They criticize those women who go against the patriarchy and question them for a change; and oftentimes in India they even comment, ‘ladki haath sei nikal gayi’ (she is out of your hands) like hell yeah, you are no one to control her! She saw how you were squashing her and she got rid of you, that’s powerful. Or maybe just those women who wish to bring the same change as men, and that’s where the criticism begins. It’s calculated in the sense that she has an evil plan when she is only doing the same thing a man did with a proper plan but has to face backlash for it. Same is when women are called drama queens jokingly and are always said that they overreact because them ‘reacting’ is always too much as their opinions aren’t valued the way the men’s are.
“When a man says no, it’s the end of a conversation, When a woman says no, it’s the beginning of a negotiation“ I mean do I even need to explain that? That’s truth in itself if we paid more attention to our normal everyday conversations which we overlook. And men are always taken more seriously which is absolutely unfair and just impractical and just infuriating okay, I’ve freaking noticed this in real life a lot times too, IT’S NOT FAIR.
And yeah, that’s it for today, have you ever felt any of these in your daily life? PS I have more posts on this coming soon!
When men are oppressed it’s a tragedy, When women are oppressed it’s a tradition…
-Letty Cottin Pogrebin
And thus, I begin a new chapter on my blog, this one which I will hopefully finish, but first of all, happy international women’s day, here is to breaking the bias between both genders (which is the theme for this year too so pun intended)!
Orsa means beginning or start in Latin and yeah here is my step towards equality for both genders, feminism and breaking stereotypes and taboos. I have back to back posts planned out for the next few days, this one is a poem I wrote on menstruation which is seriously a topic that the society should stop treating like it’s horrible, it’s normal people get over it, and then I have some facts on it on how hard it is :)……. Here we go……
A drop she sheds,
And many more so,
Life she gives,
But her pain you don’t know.
You sneer upon her agony,
You call her pain disgusting,
When in reality it’s a beauty,
Even though her anger might sometimes be disrupting.
She hides it from you,
So you feel comfortable,
Only tells a few,
Even when she herself is uncomfortable,
Stop the discrimination,
And the seclusion,
It’s because your lack of education,
Why the segregation because of menstruation?
It’s not harmful,
Neither is it infectious,
Periods are a part of life,
And create many more.
“Menstrual blood is the only blood that isn’t born from violence but is the one that disgusts society the most.” Periods, menstruation, that time of the month, menorrhea, Aunt Flo, the monthlies or the curse. A blessing for many deemed a curse. Something so beautiful which disrelishes many.
Menstruation is defined as the process in which a person discharges blood and other material from the lining of the uterus at intervals of about one lunar month from puberty until menopause, except during pregnancy. It’s not only women who menstruate but many men too.
The society scorns those who openly speak about it. It is considered shameful to talk about it, and; a woman menstruating is considered infertile. Numerous taboos are revolving around periods. Females from a young age are taught to keep a poker face about periods. To conceal it and never to talk about it in front of men. Men across the ages have believed that the monthly cycle is a curse bestowed upon women and it should be kept in the cupboard for it is something which is repelling and to be ashamed of.
Women across the world face different stereotypes and taboos while in their menstrual cycle. As people are getting more educated and are opening their minds, numerous taboos have started to be broken but those coming from a lowly uneducated background are still taught to be wary of periods. Even some literate men coming are disgusted by the idea of periods because of their close-mindedness. In India, 3 out of 5 women are not allowed to sit on sofas during periods, 7 out of 10 females are asked to stay out of the kitchen while on their periods. Many people are of the misconception that if a menstruating person touches a plant the plant dies, but as the UN beautifully puts it, plants don’t discriminate like humans. Such taboos need to end. Periods are normal and must be openly talked about. A female should feel comfortable talking about it with men and women alike, it’s normal and it’s life.
As per recent studies, on average, menstruation starts around the age of 12 and ends around the age of 52. That is about 40 years of menstrual periods. Most women have their period cycle around 28 days, one lunar cycle, which is approximately one month. 40 years and 12 periods per year i.e. 40×12 months = 480 periods. The average length of periods is about 3-5 days which is 1440-2400 days of bleeding. That’s 4-6.5 years of bleeding. Women bleed for 4-6.5 years only to be called the weaker gender. Period pain is said to be almost as painful as heart attack pain, yet women are still looked down upon when they are in their flowering time. To face differentiation for the pain they go through in the journey of life, for the journey of life.
Periods aren’t infectious, neither are they repulsing, they are part of a beautiful and wonderful phase of life. Women shed blood, but unlike men, they shed the blood of life not of warfare and killing. We as humans need to put an end to the taboos surrounding menstruation, we need to start talking openly about it and normalising it. It’s time we brought a change in this world for the better, brought a change for those whose change brings us life.
This one was a bit different than my old posts but the next few ones are like this… Hope you give them a read 🙂 Here’s to the many strong women who’ve made this world a better place for all the other girls by showing that change can be brought……